Our youngest son is a director and his first film he asked me to come with him on some interviews and he was using me like a garden tool. And one of the things he said is I was loved too much, that was his problem, that was his…
His cross, yeah, that I loved him too much. And I said I would do it all again because the alternative is hideous.
My parents were very tough. Not just strict, they, they didn’t care to see an individual outside of who they were and how it translated to their, their life you know. Yeah. That’s no way to live.
The nickname that my parents had for me dummer Hund which if you don’t speak German means dumb dog. You know so, when Alan Berger, the man who said you should write books for kids I thought hm, I don’t know what he’s talking about I’m a dumb dog, because you carry it with you. If you say to a child, if you make fun of them or call them a name or say don’t be a moron, you should know this by your age.
They, those kids are listening to every word and it helps to knit the fabric of their self-image, every time you do that.
I don’t know, I don’t know how I, I carry it with me. I still have some resentment, I still have feelings of not being worthy enough, of not being perfect enough. But with age, you can use like a sander, like sandpaper and take away the rough edges and go about your business and I’m having a great life.
Mr. Donald Rock was the head of music at McBernie’s School for Boys, blue blazer, grey slacks, tie. And he said to me really one sentence I remember in my entire McBernie’s School for Boys history was “Winkler, if you ever do get out of here, you’re going to be okay.”
And I thought maybe I have a shot. You know my joke is that I held onto those words like DiCaprio held onto the wood when he slid off the boat, you know into the cold water.
It’s something that we all should be thinking about all the time, that every interaction you have with a child no matter how casual is recorded by that child, adults are really powerful. Kids look to adults to, you know to validate themselves.